Monday, August 4, 2008

A Glass Case of Emotion

There are things we do that defy logic. Sometimes we move forward solely based on our emotions. Yesterday, as I was trapped in a epic struggle with a puzzle, stubbornness and frustration flowed through the air, suffocating anyone foolish enough to walk by.

When I was handed a cube with interlocking pieces and told to take it apart, no one was aware that my life was about to take a dramatic turn. My new goal, one that trumped all others, was to reassemble the cube. I could not rest until there were no loose pieces.

It's easy to watch from a distance and say, "it's just a stupid puzzle, just throw that thing away, I don't care". I realized the ridiculousness of my situation. The cube had no impact on my life whatsoever and I had more important things to do. It did not matter.

When I finally completed the puzzle much later, it was not a moment of triumph, more of a snap back into a reality. I felt I had wasted my time and had nothing to show for it. I don't know why I cared so much. I wasn't trying to prove anyone wrong. I wasn't even trying to prove myself wrong. I knew I could do it with enough time.

Thus is humanity, we may have foolish goals, but we are sure tenacious and stubborn. In the end, there really is no logic, only our emotional drives and some damn cubes that need assembling.

4 comments:

jq said...

Nice post, NTG.

I had a similar thought on Saturday, while I was playing a round of "Crash Team Racing" on my PS1. Here I was, running the same exact race course over and over again, intent on getting first place. Why? Even if I win, I've only beaten 7 computerized opponents in an imaginary competition that has no consequence in even my own life. Yet that doesn't stop me from gripping the controller with sweaty palms, swearing at the imaginary cartoons that throw nitroglycerin my way.

I think sometimes we tackle these seemingly pointless endeavors as a way to accomplish some goal, to prove that we are capable of forward progress. Sometimes it's accomplishing the smaller, more mundane goals that makes the wait for the longer-range ones more endurable.

Anonymous said...

Who is to say that our emotions are not tied in with our sense of logic? It is well proven that when we are happy, we are healthier and more motivated. What's forward progress? :) Do yo believe that time is linear?

Not This God said...

JQ - I didn't even want to get into video games. Everyone needs leisure time, but games can be more work than fun. It's depressing to think of all the hours I've spent doing a task over and over again in a game to move forward for no reason.

Anonymous - Honestly, no one has an understanding of what forward progress is. Society's overall goal is health and happiness for everyone, but past that we are moving blindly. I don't think time is linear, but anything other than a single universe with a fixed timeline hurts my head, so I go about my days pretending otherwise.

Anonymous said...

It's good you are able to pretend. :)