Thursday, June 5, 2008

The Power is Yours

During these troubling economic times, with rising energy costs, I figure it is my civic duty to give a few pointers on saving money.

Bike to Work - The good news is that climate change may be turning cold northern cities into tropical paradises, and as an added bonus, you may have hurricane force winds at your back. The bad news is people in southern states may get buried in a desert sandstorm.

Alternative Heating - Books are for old people and sociopaths. Burn them for warmth. All you need is your RSS feeds.

Cut Back on Oil Wrestling - Make it a once a month affair. Oil wrestling may be sexy, but these days it's costly and dangerous when smokers are in the room.

Befriend a Saudi Prince - You have a giant SUV, they have tons of oil. It's a friendship made in heaven.

Drill for Your Own Oil - You've seen the movie Armageddon. It's easy to do and the government may ask you to save the world someday.

Become an Active Environmentalist - Shame your friends into buying a hybrid. This will effectively drive down the demand of oil, which will in turn drive down the price. Then you can buy that Hummer you've always wanted.

These are just a few helpful pointers. Now get out there and make Captain Planet proud.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Your posts are terrific. I'm an instant fan. Please keep 'em coming.